- The Most Put Upon Man in the World - The President of The United States
(No matter who’s in the office, anything he does is going to be criticized by a good percentage of the country. If you want a friend in Washington - get a dog.)
- The Most Ubiquitous Man in the World - Regis Philbin
(He’s out of control!)
- The Most Exhausting Man in the World - Keith Olbermann
(How is he able to talk that fast?)
- The Most Obnoxious Man in the World - Donald Trump
(The hair gives him the edge!)
- The Most Delusional Man in the World - O. J. Simpson
(He has turned denial into an art form.)
- The Most Unobtrusive Man in the World - Todd Palin
(What exactly does he do with his day?)
- The Most Valueless “Family Values” Man in the World - South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford
(Don’t cry for me Argentina.)
- The Most Loquacious Man in the World - Joe Biden
(Can anyone get a word in edgewise?)
- The Most Overbearing Man in the World - The ShamWow Guy.
(Though we really miss Billy Mays.)
- The Most Over-promoted Man in the World - Samuel Joseph Wurzelbacher, aka Joe the Plumber
(Plumber... maybe. Foreign correspondent and news commentator... huh?)
- The Most Unsettling Advertising Spokesman in the World - The Burger King
(He just creeps me out!)